I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
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