Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
