Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
soo... how was my night?
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