There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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