I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I think I am morally bankrupt
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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