Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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