You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Drunk is a universal language darling
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
