:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
