so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
