I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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