I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Blood and glitter go together right?
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
