Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
