I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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