I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Houston, we have a squirter
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
