"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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