drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
