a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
