You can't special order awesome
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
