Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
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