Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
