8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
