it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
