He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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