Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
