I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Sorry about my life...
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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