know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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