Umm I'm too high to move.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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