who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
