Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
