Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
