we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
