i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
