I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
They have beer where we have blood.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
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