There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
The best revenge is premature balding
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize