did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
