So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
