but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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