Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
