Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Just high enough for therapy.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
