Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize