Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
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