we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Randomize
