She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
