Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
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