so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
