what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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