Where are you?
In a non slutty way
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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