You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
