Having a random hookup so left but love u
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
