After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize