I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
